👽 I Don’t Think I’m From Here

(a starseed trying to believe)

I don’t think I’ve ever really believed in myself.
Not the way they talk about in books.
Not the way people post about on Instagram —
with glittery captions and 5-step morning routines.

Mostly, I’ve believed in… survival.
In pulling myself out of darkness just enough to breathe.
In staying alive, not because I felt strong,
but because I didn’t know what else to do.

And yet —
somewhere inside me
there’s a small flicker
that dreams of being seen.
Of creating something that matters.
Of being known without having to explain my soul every time.

Sometimes I think I’m not from here.
Because this reality is slow,
and sticky,
and drenched in poison.

People care more about the packaging than the presence.
And I’ve spent most of my life cleaning up emotional blood
that wasn’t even mine.

I don’t know if that counts as self-belief.
But I know I’m still here.
Still dreaming.
Still showing up.
Maybe that’s its own kind of faith.

Sofy